Six - and two threes

I came across some nice old-fashioned boarding school stories the other day (by an author called Louise O. Weston) and once I'd read one collection, I wanted to go back to the Kindle store for more. But at the time I couldn't remember the author's name or the book title (and by then I'd deleted the collection that I'd read).
All I could remember was that the title included the phrase 'six of the best'. So I searched for that on my Kindle and was surprised at just how many books it threw back at me.

Boy, has this CP-related phrase gone mainstream. In fact, I wonder if the vanilla world knows what it's saying when it talks about that  'best'?
Presumably 'six of the best' doesn't have a life beyond the UK. Here, whenever a publication does some sort of product review the editor seems to think that the page has to carry six of whatever's been evaluated. Not five, not seven, sometimes a top 10 - but more often than not six of the best. Whether it's boots, waterproofs or cameras, they have to come in sixes.
Is this all an innocent use of half a dozen? We Brits like to cleave to the old ways, so we use our acres, miles and ounces when it would make more sense to go metric, but even so...
But you only have to run the phrase through Google to see how much sixing is going on out there. For example, when the ex-public schoolboys of Genesis got together for a reunion I reckon they chose 'Six of the Best' as the name of their temporary band for nostalgic reasons.
There's a lot less ambiguity when it comes to the band Lip Service. I reckon the cover of their album 'Six of the Best' speaks for itself, don't you?
Then there's the 80s girl group Clout. What did they call their second ablum? You've got it.
Innocent or not, I like it. I love the way iI can be flipping through a mag at the doctor's or a paper on the train and turn a page and... there's a reference to six and my mind is off to it's favorite fantasy boarding school for naughty girls and boys.
By the way,a six and two threes is a phrase my dear old Mum likes to use and has nothing at all to do with that other six (of the best). It's her shorthand for when something makes little difference one way or another.

Kardashian, Form 6b

An uncertain knock at the door. This was the bit of the job Dr Helen Wright enjoyed the most - dealing with troublesome pupils. And she felt it was very much her forte, afterall she was the most senior of headmistresses in all of England's private girls' schools.

"Come," she said, her voice sharp and commanding. The girl came in, a pretty girl (in a rather slutty sort of way), but in an ill-fitting uniform. It seemed as though she was wearing the clothes of a girl a year her junior.

"Yes?"

"Kardashian, miss," the girl answered nervously. She stood in front of the imposing walnut desk with her hands folded under her bottom and her gaze lowered.

"Ah yes, I've reports here that we need to discuss." Dr Wright moved papers around on the desk in front of her until she came upon a buff-coloured folder.

"Miss Honeybun, domestic science. She tells me that 'the descent of Western civilisation can practically be read into your every curve'. Mr Chips, woodwork,  appears to blame you for 'almost everything that is wrong with Western society today'. And Miss Bormann, modern history, suggests you're to blame for your peers 'soaking up a diet of empty celebrity and superficiality'."

Dr Wright paused, looked up and gave the girl her best penetrating look. "Anything to say?"

Kardashian seemded too abashed to say a single word in her defence, but after a moment she did manage to mumble: "Sorry, miss."

"Indeed," said Dr Wright, and she turned to the heavy leather tome to the right of her desk - the one marked 'Punishment Book'. For all that she pretended not to know the girl in front of her, she was actually all too aware of her notable qualities.

Possibly the complaints about her were rather exaggerated, but it would be a delight to deal with her firmly. I expect she has to slave in the gym to keep that posterior in shape, the Head thought to herself. What a pleasure to cane that rather ample backside.

 

How boring is that...?

How come she's so uninterested in the fix she's got herself into? Panties down and the cane's there ready for use but she looks like she's totally bored by the proceedings.

Maybe it's a different take on cornertime. Instead of an hour in the corner waiting for your whacking you get an hour bent and ready - and cornertime can be seriously tedious.

Or perhaps she's a repeat offender, such a Punishment Room veteran that she's just not bothered anymore. Sort of "see if I care". Familiarity breeds contempt, I suppose.

Whatever it's about, it's a great drawing - I'd love to see more of this artist's work. Anywhere know who its by? Thanks to the first-rate Spanking Art for posting it for us all to enjoy.

Feeling glad

With apologies to the great Julie Andrews. Here's today's reason to be cheerful...

Raindrops on roses and whiskers on kittens

Bright copper kettles and warm woolen mittens

Brown paper packages tied up with strings

These are a few of my favorite things!

Cream colored ponies and crisp apple strudels

Doorbells and sleigh bells and schnitzel with noodles

Wild geese that fly with the moon on their wings

These are a few of my favorite things!

Girls in white dresses with blue satin sashes

Snowflakes that stay on my nose and eye lashes

Silver white winters that melt into spring

These are a few of my favorite things!

When the dog bites, when the bee stings

When I'm feeling sad,

I simply remember

my favorite things

and then I don't feel so bad!

Or, how about?

When the tawse bites, 
when the cane stings
when I'm feeling bad,
I simply remember 
my favourite things
and then I feel really quite glad!

Recently punished...

"Just this morning, wasn't it?" She didn't answer. The nod of the downturned head was close to imperceptible. "I asked you a question. When did you last receive a punishment?"

"Today, miss," she said, her voice low, sulky, resentful.

"Don't take that tone with me, Wood."

"Sorry, miss."

Miss Birch lifted Wood's pleated, grey skirt and tugged the girl's navy knickers out and down. Her buttocks were a cheerful pink and blotched by the darker markings of the hairbrush spanking she had been given just after breakfast.

"Did it hurt?"

"Yes, miss"

"But not enough, clearly. You're punished for bad behaviour and then just four hours later I come across you running in the corridors. What should I deduce from that?"

Wood wasn't sure what 'deduce' meant. "I don't know miss."

"I do know, 'miss'. That you're a girl who's developed resistance to this particular form of medicine," Miss Birch said, letting the skirt fall back into place. She took a step across the room to a cupboard, opened its door and took out a cane, before turning back to face the girl.

"Stronger medicine is called for, don't you think?" Miss Birch said. Wood's answer was to whisper a "yes" that Miss Birch didn't quite hear, but that she wasn't that worried one way or another.

More motorway

Eating up the miles - and the fuel, sadly - and now I'm taking a tea break. I've just been browsing through a cool image blog called Spanking Art (which does what it says on the tin) and have picked this pic for the next hour or so's bit of the journey. 

Remember those writing exercises they gave you in school? Here's a picture, now write a story about it. 

And this is the one for this afternoon. It's a school setting, clearly. Miss Slim, the Vice-Principal (Discipline), is just about to apply the cane. But why is the girl in the corner looking so please? If she's going to get the same surely she'd be lookling a little more worried.

If it's any good maybe I'll make it a short story and share it with the world here.

Does my bum look big...

...ON this? Yes, the strategic use of pillows, cushions or whatever is a great way of getting the target area just right for cane, belt or tawse. But it doesn't necessarily do a big-boned girl any favours. Anyone's behind is going to look a bit broad in this context. This scan from the 1980s mag 'Blushes' popped up at The Pink Papers and is a great example of the Blushes/Janus way of doing things. Must have been edgy stuff in its day, but the photo sets look rather lifeless now to my eye.