The road had been narrow and I'd been intimidated by a man in a van coming the other way, but impact was definitely my fault. But it look like I'd got away with it - the passenger door mirror was upside down, not off.
A few miles down the road I stopped and went round to straighten the mirror out and was horrified to discover that the plastic housing was gone, shattered to smithereens. Bad, but what made it worse is that this was my first solo outing in our lovely new (to us) VW Camper.
SO had waved me away the day before with the words "now don't bring my van back crunched..." I have to say I felt terrible and spent the rest of the journey home trying to work out how and when to break the news.
What happens next? In the wonderful world of spanko imagination I'd be driving home to a woodshed whipping that I'd never forget, wouldn't I? Of course, that didn't happen.
It turned out that SO was very understanding - accidents do happen. But I have had to pay. As it happens the day I messed up that mirror was the last day of the long school holidays and the next morning was the first time in more than a month that the house was kid-free.
By mutual agreement yours truly was heading for a long overdue attitude adjustment that I just couldn't wait to collect. Lots of little black marks had been noted over the weeks and the time had come to straighten things out.
When I heard the school bus heading off down the hill I went back to bed to talk things over. I feel awful about the van, I said, and SO said I should.
I feel like a deserve a REAL punishment. "Yes, you do." Something that I won't forget... And that's what I got.
I never understand how DD couples untangle TTWD from the stick and carrot stuff. In our house I pay my dues to society by NOT being spanked. SO got breakfast in bed and I've resolved to drive much more carefully in the future.
That would be a tough DD problem here. How often do we really earn a good sound punishment? Making a mistake anyone could make doesn't qualify in my book, but I guess it's something. I think the first 'D' in DD stands for desire, and the second stands for desire. If people want it to work, they make it work.
ReplyDeleteI can't see how DD works when desire is part of the equation, but I read blogs written by people who swear it works for them as a desire-free disciplianry regime...
DeleteThe mirror is long forgotten now. And my post-summer catch up happened over the weekend, so I start the new week with a smile on my face - and stripes on my sit-upon!
Congrats! There's also Delicious Discipline. :)
ReplyDeleteA disciplinary regime growing up wasn't something I desired, but the way I understand adults who blog about it, they want it. They want it lots. I can understand that on some level---wanting the regime but fearing the punishment. It's a form of communication. Very intimate. Inspires a change in behavior. If it's not always perfectly effective discipline, that's fine; the process is fulfilling.